Nothing is True

I am writing this post from Lynx on my netbook. Just seeing how the look and feel is. I've decided to trying doing more writing in command-line mode and having Gnome running in the background (basically to run a media player and collect tweets). Vim and Screen work perfectly. Lynx appears to be a bit of a compromised browser if you're used to using Firefox all the time, but it lets you do basic web browsing and make the odd entry onto websites.

Of course the main problem with Lynx is that it lacks a built in spell checker and that's something I rely on heavily when using Firefox because my spelling is terrible.

I'm not dead. I'm not gone. I'm just watching a blank cliff face waiting for the sun to cast shadows on invisible handholds.

This proof of concept has satisfied my curiosity.

Until next year,

Will

When you have a degree in computer science and are applying for work as a general labourer you know something has gone hideously wrong.

Will put full details in later when I've finalized this post. Only here for sharing with beta-readers.

I am broke! To give you a wee taster of how broke let me just say that looking at my bank balance is an exercise in gazing into the jaws of infinity and losing sanity points.

So I am asking for you help*. Obviously I am going to give you something in return. I've got a 3975 word story which I have been sitting on since April. So if you send me as much money as you feel like donating** I will send you the story in whatever format you require that I can produce using OpenOffice.

Simple, eh?

And the first of two bonuses to sweeten the deal is that once I reach a certain value then I will release the story to the public. Let's say that considering that the commercial value of the story at pro-rates of five cents a word*** is $198.75 or £121 or €132 which is a bit steep to be asking for I will release the whole thing for free to everyone (licensed under creative commons non-commercial attribution and remix) if I get a minimum of $100 (£60 or €66).

The second bonus, is that if I get the full value of the story, apart from being over the fucking moon, I will do a short podcast and Q&A session about this story.

Eilean Buntata

The Steamship Black Rose had already sank into the ocean by the time me and my employers, Matthew and Eliza Gauger, arrived at the shore of the barren beach. With us in the rowing boat were three traveling trunks and the ships cat. We beached the boat and Eliza started to give orders. "Well get to it. The sun is about to set and we need a fire as soon as possible."

"With all due respect cousin. I believe that our first priority should be get the boat further up the beach. Do you not think so Fred?" said Matthew.

This presented me with a hard choice. I could side with Mr Gauger and good sense whilst risking the scorn of Miss Gauger for a hours. The other option was to follow Miss Gauger's plan and make a compromise.

"I think Miss Gauger that me and Matthew should take the boat and its contents up the beach. While you look for some firewood."

Miss Gauger glared at me. "If that is what you honestly think. Will one of you help me onto the shore?"

I stepped out of the beached boat and into the surf. Mr Gauger did the same a moment later. The boat rocked as the weight redistributed. "Be careful cousin," said Mr Gauger, as Eliza stood up. She extended her gloved hands towards the two of us and we helped her to the shore.

We were sitting around the camp fire behind the first dune in a break from the wind. Mr Gauger had recently returned from the beach with freshly caught fish. I was busy preparing our desert island feast when Mr Gauger made one of his unusual comments. "Eliza, what do you think was within that create we were escorting to San Fransisco?"

Miss Gauger looked into the fire and smiled. "Why do you want to know?"

"Well it's strange the sea around where I suppose the SS Black Rose must now rest on the seabed appears to be glowing."

Miss Gauger got to her feet and declared, "you must show me."

"By all means. Fred, are you coming?" said Mr Gauger.

I followed Mr and Mrs Gauger over the top of the dune. The effect that Matthew had described was quite clear to see. On the horizon a patch of tangerine light glowed from underneath the waves.

"I do not think it is anything we need to worry about," said Miss Gauger.

"The ocean is glowing orange," said Mr Gauger.

"No need to worry," said Miss Gauger with confidence. "Shall we go back to the fire?"

Does that sound cool? Do you want to read more?

Then click on the PayPal button below and donate away. Remember any amount gets you the story in any format I can produce with OpenOffice sent to you and that if I reach $100 then I'll release the story for free for everyone to read. If I get $199 then I will do a podcast and a Q&A session (so do send those questions via comment or email).

Oh wait why am I doing this aside from the fact that I need the dough? Well there have been a few people on the Internet (Cory Doctorow, Hal Duncan, Eliza Gauger, Amanda Palmer and Trent Reznor) working this model. And if I've entertained you with that extract then I reckon it would be a fair trade to have a small amount of your moneys.


* And I really hate having to do this. I'd like to give the story away for nothing.
** If you want a minimum let's say 3 quid ($5) because that's the price of a bottle of my favorite beer at "The Pub".
*** That number is slightly debatable as well according to evidence here. But enough quibbling I'm happy with five cents.

I'm in Edinburgh at the moment but leaving tomorrow for Fort William.

Cut my thumb opening a bottle of wine at Magnus's house yesterday. It's only superficial but it hurts to type. I am intending to climb quite a lot while I'm in Fort William since there is a decent bouldering wall apparently.

I say only superficial but it hurts to type and use a pen.

Which maybe a problem if one of the other things I was intending to do was write at least 10,000 words of fiction this week.

Ah well so it goes. At least it was good wine and pizza with an old friend*.

One day that anecdote will be recycled into fiction.

Maybe someone dies from slicing their thumb open on foil.

The process of writing stuff is a funny ol' business.

Anyway time for bed and sleep despite the fact I'm the most comfortable position I've been for a long time**.

And I still haven't been climbing on Salsbury crags which are right behind the Halls of Residence I'm staying in. But this is a problem of time rather than apathy.

Peace & Love

Will.

* I can't think of many people I'm still in contact with on a regular basis from 7 years ago. There is maybe a bias towards people I know from THE INTERNET! as oppose to real life. But then the social networks I deal with online are self selecting and aren't formed by random evolution.

** Sitting in a plastic/wooden/upholstered chair in the well lit reception of Pollock Halls of Residence at ten to one in the morning with my laptop sitting on my lap and my left leg crossed over my right knee.

The meme:

1. Comment to this post and I will give you 5 subjects/things I associate you with.
2. Then post this in your LJ and elaborate on the subjects given.

I was given a few subjects by a fellow called Richard Shaw.

This is an interesting set of subjects for me to write about. Almost as if the person knew me well a few years back and hasn't caught up with the latest revisions of "my life". My fault there I admit. Besides these are as good a set of subjects to write about as any.

1, Anime.

I like anime and I don't like anime. The thing is that anime and manga often have the wicked cool and indescribable aesthetic which I enjoy. But at the same time I often feel that the medium is riddled with melodrama and third-rate filler material. Besides recently I've found it increasingly hard to sit down at a TV/Computer and blast through a series in a few very long sittings. Consequently while I have watched a fair few selected episodes from many different series I have not seen many complete series of anime.

I tend also to treat anime as just another branch of world cinema and put off watching subtitled episodes/films in favour of filling my brain with junk TV originally written in English. Or I read a good book. A clear case in point here is that my Godzilla DVD has been sitting on my desk unwatched for an embarrassing number of months.

2, Switzerland.

I don't really know what to say for this topic. It's evident to most people that know me that I enjoyed the time I spent there and am deeply nostalgic for the place, and the people. It's the mountains I suspect. That and the cheap, nasty cider from Denner.

3, Linux.

What can I say about Linux that doesn't sound geeky? I already use it as the only operating system on my desktop computer. I studied large parts of Linux technically at University. As I also studied open source philosophy and development methods. So again like the Switzerland topic it's slightly too obvious for me to say: "it is great."

I won't do that. Instead I'll bore you with some political waffle. Way back in the sands of time when I first used Linux (12/13 years of age) for reasons so banal I won't say. Way back then I didn't have any real ideological sense of self. You don't expect kids of that age to. The ones that do tend to sit firmly on an extreme of some sort. But Linux was my gateway into I guess what you could call 'anarchistic thoughts'. It in case you are unaware of the finer points of the project is a wonderful example of free and open source software (FOSS).

The idea of FOSS is that I can get some software for a price (normally gratis- due to FOSS market forces) and I can see the source code that makes up the software. This is transparent and not hidden from me the user. I can also make changes to that source code in order to produce my own personal version of the software. I could be correcting bugs or adding new features, whatever. Later after a bit of bureaucratic wrangling it is also likely for many projects that my additions and corrections will be accepted into later versions of the software.

This about this for a minute or two. This is when done correctly peer reviewed software. This is a good thing. It provides a method of many people to contribute to the same project to make it better.

A few steps of magical thinking later and I'm an individual that tries to be open in sharing personal thought processes and have a tendency towards anarchism/mutalism. Just don't ask me how I feel about capitalism, socialism and communism. I have no time for economics.

4, William Gibson.

Ah good old William Gibson. Neuromancer was a book that I read when I was about 13 or 14. I can't remember when exactly. But it was I suspect the last term I spent at Humphrey Perkins. When other kids were reading Harry Potter in the 20 minutes quiet reading time I was reading Neuromancer.

I don't know what it is about the novel, or the author. I admit that a lot of my early attempts at writing fiction were in direct imitation of William Gibson. They were also very poor imitations. This due to the fact that writing prose in a really clear way, without saying much at all, is in fact the hardest thing to do without years of practice. This I admire.

5. Writing.

Oh this is a fun subject to write about. What do I say? Do I write about how I think about writing short stories? How my method of thinking of it like a bouldering problem or sport climbing route helps me visualise the narrative beats I need to it in order to write a good story. Do I jump up an abstract level and talk about how the smile of peoples' faces from hearing or reading a good story is one the most precious things in the world. Especially if some part of that story originated from me.

I am as you can see a bit stuck on what to write for this subject. Although listing the many possible subjects within the greater one does give some weak illumination on how I feel about this topic. So I'll continue.

Do I tell you about how there is something worse than writers block? That anxiety and fear that the words you are writing are crap. Even though you have no rational basis to believe that without asking someones opinion. Or more importantly you heard a reading from a novel that won a major prize which consisted of many dull lifeless sentences.

Do I mention that the best place for me to write is on the move? That if money was no object my lifestyle would be that of a nomadic city hopper. Someone who arrived at an area of interest and stayed for as long as they needed to write something that encapsulates the time spent there.

Do I talk of the tools that I use to write? The pens, the paper, the computer software. Do I talk of future dreams of making a living by writing? Or do I just mention the time today where I wrote a letter for a friend who was stuck explaining a situation to someone?

Do I talk about how I've written over 60,000 words of serialised fiction for the Internet over the past six years? Or should I just talk about my one failed attempt at writing a novel? Even though it was receive warmly by my fellow ectomites.

Do I stop here? Yes. Because I need to go to bed and need to pause this introspective gaze.

Peace, love, etc,

Will.

23/02/09

What am I doing?

Not at a lot with my life at the moment it turns out. I am writing a bit, although less than I should be. Climbing more. Almost stopped tabletop gaming altogether due to reasons I won't discuss here. But also because I suspect my creative agenda does not match the rest of my groups in a way that's radically different.

The climbing again is fun. Starting to feel stronger, fitter and more back to where I was when I was stronger.

I am sadly still looking for gainful employment. Which is a shitter since I'd like to be doing something other than entertaining myself all day. The money would not hurt as well. Since I'd have more freedom to climb, drink, be merry with friends.

Projects wise I have got a few things on the go I guess. I am doing the new website for the DMU Climbing society. I am working on a short story to be submitted to somewhere. Well I am working on two short stories to be submitted to somewhere. But one of them I have stalled on and decided I need to rewrite from the start. I guess that is about it in the way of active projects. Do a website, write.

I'd add training for climbing to that very short list. But that is not really a project in the same way. I mean I have got a few goals I'd like to reach by the summer. Climb F6a/b on top rope (if not lead). Probably being able to boulder V4 stuff reasonably well would be nice. Be some conception of the very vague idea of 'hill fit'. Any other goals to do with climbing involve spending money so it's best to ignore them.

Yeah, that's about the extent of what I am doing. Of course I am reading lots of books as well. But that's normal behaviour for me.

Peace, love, etc kids,

Will.

I'm not dead just sleeping.
Quite a lot actually.

Still alive.
Just looking for gainful employment and writing.

I am looking for work.
But I'm off to run a game of Call of Cthulhu now.